Nobody ever talks about the married single mother. Female Life Coach in New York
People talk about married moms. They co-parent with their husband to take care of their children and run their home. I know many families where the father goes to work, while the mother either stays home to take care of the kids or works full or part time. Many of these women are doctors, teachers, therapists, and work in other highly rewarding jobs. Then, after the workday is done, the father comes home and joins in the family activities. He is the one who washes the dishes while the mom cooks. He helps the teenager study for her math test while the mother tests her son on his spelling words. One gives the baby a bath while the other reads the toddler a story before bed. At the end of the night, the mother and father have formed a bond together, and with their children, because they are all functioning together as a cohesive family. The parents are a united front, helping each other raise their kids. Female Life Coach in New York
Then there are the single moms (and single dads.) They do everything alone. The mom wakes up early to make breakfast for her kids and pack their lunches. She puts the laundry in the washing machine and helps the kids get dressed and ready for school. She then puts them on the bus or drives them to school, and then goes to work, or back home to a full day of family-focused errands. Then, she does afternoon carpool (or arranges for the babysitter or a family member to do pick up.) This is followed by dinner, homework, bathtime, and bedtime, which she does all by herself, unless she is lucky enough to have help from family or a babysitter. And if a child is sick, all the above plans are thrown up in the air as she does the best she can to manage the healthy kids, while taking her sick child to the doctor, urgent care, or hospital.
And then there’s the married single mother. She is legally married, living under the same roof with her husband and children. He comes home every night (except when he’s traveling.) When people look at her raising her kids, “She’s married,” they say. “Of course he helps,” they assume. “I mean they’re his kids too.”
This is not always the case. Yes, he might be home after a long day of work, but what does he do when he gets home? Is he checked out? Does he spend his time in his home office doing more work? Is he plopped on the couch watching tv? Endlessly scrolling on his phone?
This leaves the mom to do ALL the work that married parents are supposed to be doing together. It’s the mother who gets up early to prepare the kids for school, take them to school, get them to after school activities, cook, clean, do laundry, homework, plan birthday parties and family gatherings, cook for shabbat and holidays, drive to appointments and playdates, manage teenagers and their moods, take care of sick children, and possibly work a full or part time job on top of all that. IT’S EXHAUSTING!! But nobody has a clue that she’s the one doing it all on her own because she has a husband, and he “must be helping her.” Except that he’s not helping her.
Being a married single mother can feel lonely, embarrassing and demoralizing. It can cause you to question your self-worth, your values, and your decisions. It can cause you to become physically and emotionally ill. Do you want to continue to live like this or are you ready to make a change in your life. The choice is up to you. If you are ready to start living a life that is aligned with your beliefs and makes you feel happy and empowered, THAT IS POSSIBLE! To find out how, schedule a free discovery call with me and let’s start taking the first steps to creating a life you love! Female Life Coach in New York
